I can't even tell you how much I do not want to return to school this year. Just going back to get orientation stuff over the last few days felt like torture. School is so suffocating, or at least it feels that way. Just gotta keep thinking that this will be over in roughly 7 months..
Dear _,
I wish I could tell you everything and that you would listen. Without judgment and assumptions. If it was just anyone else it would not matter to me in the least, but from you, it is completely different... as much as I try to convince myself otherwise. You really don't get it and the odds are undoubtedly against you. At this rate I don't know what will happen.
I'm hoping for your sake, you can come through this time.
Yours,
Jas.
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Monday, August 17, 2009
Renewal.
Recently there has been so much change. At the end of almost everyday, before I knocking out for the night, for some unexplainable reason I feel like a different person. Though I never did any kind of intro about me, I feel a need to redefine myself, for myself in as short a time as possible. &IDGAF.
My full name is Jasmine Michelle/Mimi Nguyen. I think true and uncontrolled laughter is the best thing ever created by whoever's up there. I say whoever, cause I don't know who is. My life goal currently is to be 5foot 5 inches. Quite a goal for this supposedly-hispanic-looking asian chick, hm?
I'm attracted to real unique people who know what they want. And naw, unique doesn't mean you're a weird freak, it means there's no one out there who's got that little somethin that you do. I don't mind the others; you can't have your lovers without your haters. mhmm.
My family calls me "Mimi" but I won't respond to it unless you're one of them. And oh yes, I do have the only two normal dimples in the family. Some call me cocky and arrogant. Oh well cause those that really know it, they know I'm your sillygoose. They also say i have multiple personalities... hahaha i don't deny that. And I could care less what you think (=
Give me a good joke and i'll laugh, i promise. Even if it's just to make sure you don't feel bad. Give me a serious conversation, and I'll be your AsianOprah.
I try to live everything day by day cause really, the next minute is the future, and i'd rather think of that then think of myself years from now. I don't understand why people talk BS. It's a waste of breath babe, you should save it.
With everything, being up-front and straightforward with me gets the message across. It works, trust me.
I am your chocolate eating, kickbox loving, dimplewearing Jas. and now I'm tired.
My full name is Jasmine Michelle/Mimi Nguyen. I think true and uncontrolled laughter is the best thing ever created by whoever's up there. I say whoever, cause I don't know who is. My life goal currently is to be 5foot 5 inches. Quite a goal for this supposedly-hispanic-looking asian chick, hm?
I'm attracted to real unique people who know what they want. And naw, unique doesn't mean you're a weird freak, it means there's no one out there who's got that little somethin that you do. I don't mind the others; you can't have your lovers without your haters. mhmm.
My family calls me "Mimi" but I won't respond to it unless you're one of them. And oh yes, I do have the only two normal dimples in the family. Some call me cocky and arrogant. Oh well cause those that really know it, they know I'm your sillygoose. They also say i have multiple personalities... hahaha i don't deny that. And I could care less what you think (=
Give me a good joke and i'll laugh, i promise. Even if it's just to make sure you don't feel bad. Give me a serious conversation, and I'll be your AsianOprah.
I try to live everything day by day cause really, the next minute is the future, and i'd rather think of that then think of myself years from now. I don't understand why people talk BS. It's a waste of breath babe, you should save it.
With everything, being up-front and straightforward with me gets the message across. It works, trust me.
I am your chocolate eating, kickbox loving, dimplewearing Jas. and now I'm tired.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Letter One.
Warning: mildly advance vocabulary.
Dear _,
I can truthfully say that I've never met anyone like you. You're intelligent to an undefined extent and I find that admirable in the most peculiar way. I gotta say, you're unique.
As two-faced as you are in my eyes, you amaze me at how you easily slide into people's good graces. Really, I just don't understand how you do it. It undoubtedly amazes how you never seem to struggle to sleep every night. And as for how you somehow managed to slip off karma's unloving list of prospects? I guess I'll never know. But I do have to confess, you taught and showed me many things I would've never discovered on my own. Maybe on some day of the Apocalypse, I'll find those lessons rewarding. I'm also pleased to let you know that ever since I've drawn a sort of line of division between us two, I haven't felt a pain in my back side. In reflection, I realized that it could have been done a long while before.
I hope that you can eventually find it in your naturally cold reserve to forgive me for confiding in you my ambitious hopes and believing your words about promises or the future. For now, I hope you enjoy the lovely false smiles. Maybe even feel some warmth. Be happy that you still have facades, cause I know how you enjoy them.
Oh, as for the guilt, it really does not fade quickly. Trust me(:
Yours Truly,
Jas.
Dear _,
I can truthfully say that I've never met anyone like you. You're intelligent to an undefined extent and I find that admirable in the most peculiar way. I gotta say, you're unique.
As two-faced as you are in my eyes, you amaze me at how you easily slide into people's good graces. Really, I just don't understand how you do it. It undoubtedly amazes how you never seem to struggle to sleep every night. And as for how you somehow managed to slip off karma's unloving list of prospects? I guess I'll never know. But I do have to confess, you taught and showed me many things I would've never discovered on my own. Maybe on some day of the Apocalypse, I'll find those lessons rewarding. I'm also pleased to let you know that ever since I've drawn a sort of line of division between us two, I haven't felt a pain in my back side. In reflection, I realized that it could have been done a long while before.
I hope that you can eventually find it in your naturally cold reserve to forgive me for confiding in you my ambitious hopes and believing your words about promises or the future. For now, I hope you enjoy the lovely false smiles. Maybe even feel some warmth. Be happy that you still have facades, cause I know how you enjoy them.
Oh, as for the guilt, it really does not fade quickly. Trust me(:
Yours Truly,
Jas.
Saturday, August 1, 2009
@ the Delta
it's been awhile haha.
Waking up at 5am in order to go boating and wakeboarding, I didn't expect to later be stranded with three people in a lake. I also didn't think I'd be watching them try to paddle us back to shore. With just one oar. Never did it take so long for a boat to move one whole foot. Being the only girl on board, I occupied myself with other things. And in the end, the duck I met on the shore and shared my food with shitted on our boatdeck.
What a day.
Waking up at 5am in order to go boating and wakeboarding, I didn't expect to later be stranded with three people in a lake. I also didn't think I'd be watching them try to paddle us back to shore. With just one oar. Never did it take so long for a boat to move one whole foot. Being the only girl on board, I occupied myself with other things. And in the end, the duck I met on the shore and shared my food with shitted on our boatdeck.
What a day.
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